Dale Carnegie 8 Lessons Learned - Mehta Marketing
"How to Win Friends and Influence People" is a self-help book written by Dale Carnegie in 1936.
It has sold over 30 million copies worldwide, making it one of the best-selling books of all time.
The book contains eight crucial lessons that can help you elevate your personal and
professional life. Currently, two of our team members are re-reading this book, and we believe
that the new year is a great time to share these eight successful tips with you. We are excited to
dive into these lessons and hope that you find them valuable and can implement them in your
life today.
The following text is a quote by Carnegie that is still popular today: “When dealing with
people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with
creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and
vanity. This is the first and most important lesson for being likable. “Don’t criticize,
condemn or complain” Although it can be challenging, it's essential to try and see things
from someone else's perspective, rather than attacking or criticizing them. Criticism can
make people feel attacked, which could turn them against you. Research has shown
that criticism is one of the most common causes of divorce. Instead of criticizing, try to
understand why people behave the way they do, show empathy, and be forgiving. In
other words, if you want to gather honey, don't kick over the beehive!
Lesson two is all about giving honest and sincere appreciation to other people. It's no
secret that we all want to feel important and appreciated. When you make someone
else feel this way, they will definitely appreciate it and love you for it. As William James
once said, "The deepest desire in human nature is the craving to be appreciated." But
it's important to be genuine and honest when showing appreciation, otherwise people
will see right through it. When dealing with others, always try to look for the positive and
ask yourself, "What is there to admire about this person?" Once you've figured it out, let
them know in an honest and straightforward way. Everyone likes to be admired. If you
find gratitude to be useful, you can make this a gratitude practice that you use each time
you meet someone.
Lesson three from Dale Carnegie's teachings is about "Arouse In The Other
Person An Eager Want". It states that while we are naturally interested in what
we want, others are the same way. In order to persuade others, we must
understand what motivates them and then present our plans or ideas in a way
that shows them how it can help them achieve their goals. Since people have
different desires and see things differently, we must see things from their
perspective and combine our goals with theirs, in order to get them eager to work
with us.
Lesson 4 is “Talk in terms of the other persons interests.” People don’t know how
much you care until you show them how much you care. It's important to focus
on the interests of the person you're speaking with. Start the conversation by
talking about what they care about. This will make them feel valued and
appreciated, and they will enjoy the conversation. If you're not sure what to talk
about, ask them about their past accomplishments or encourage them to talk
about themselves. While it's okay to share your interests, avoid dominating the
conversation with them. It's important to know your audience and tailor your
conversation to their interests and needs, just like when presenting an idea. “The
best and easy road to a person’s heart is to talk about the things they treasure the most.”
Theodore Roosevelt
Lesson 5 is simple but so important! Remember Names. “Remember that a
person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any
language. The name sets the individual apart makes him or her unique amongst
all others. Remembering other people’s names will make them feel noticed and
remembered (important in short). Make a real effort to remember and use people’s
names. From the Janitor to the Senior Executive if you approach any situation with the
name of the individual the request works magic as we deal with others. Another major
point is pronouncing name correctly, you will set yourself apart from others if you take
the effort in learning how to pronounce their name correctly.
Become Genuinely Interested In Other People this is lesson six.“You can make more
friends in two months by being interested in them than in two years by making them
interested in you.” Dale Carnegie. Reciprocity is a basic human characteristic. We tend to
be drawn towards people who show interest in us. In general, we tend to like individuals
who like us. If you greet others with enthusiasm, listen attentively, and offer a smile, you
are indicating that you like them. As a result, chances are that they will like you in return.
To achieve this, it's essential to learn to ask open-ended questions. Such questions
convey that you have time and interest in the person you are speaking with.
"There is no way to win an argument, so it is best to avoid arguments whenever possible. This is
Lesson seven - 'Avoid Arguments'. Even if you feel like you have won because the other person
accepted your point of view, you have still lost in the long run. This is because you have made
the other person feel inferior and hurt their pride. As a result, you have lost their goodwill.
Instead, it is okay to agree to disagree. Keep this in mind when interacting with others. Another
important takeaway is to hear the other person's point of view. This can help you become a
well-rounded individual in areas where you may not be an expert. Treat every interaction as an
opportunity to learn something new. As Benjamin Franklin said, 'If you argue and contradict, you
may achieve a victory sometimes, but it will be an empty victory because you will never get your
opponent's goodwill'."
Lesson Eight is the final lesson and it's about the importance of being a good listener. Good
conversations start with good listening skills. If you want to be an interesting person, you need
to show interest in others. The ability to listen well is crucial for building strong human
relationships. If you genuinely care about people, ask them questions that demonstrate your
interest in them, and listen attentively to their responses, they will enjoy talking to you. People
are most interested in themselves, their wants, and their problems. If you show a sincere
interest in them, you will prove that you also think those things are significant.
Here is our breakdown of the classic book "How to Win Friends and Influence People", along
with eight of the biggest takeaways. We hope that these insights will provide you with actionable
steps you can take today to lead a more successful and fulfilling life.